请起立。 Please stand.
主啊，请赐福在这对结婚戒指上。 Lord, bless these wedding rings.
愿穿上它们的新婚夫妇能保障他们的忠诚。 May the newlyweds who wear them safeguard their fidelity,
恪守你的旨意和平安。 abide by Thy will and peace,
永远生活在相互的爱中。 and live forever in reciprocal love.
我，吉多。 I, Guido,
-带着你，莫妮卡......-莫妮卡他妈的是谁？ -Take thee, Monica… -Who the fuck is Monica?
谁他妈的是莫妮卡？ Who the fuck is Monica?
怎么了？ What's wrong?
吉多，你说 "莫妮卡"？ Guido, you said "Monica"?
不，我说的是 "西尔维娅"。 No, I said "Silvia".
-我说过 "莫妮卡 "吗？-是的。 -Did I say "Monica"? -Yes.
-对不起。-对不起？ -Sorry. -Sorry?
我发神经了。 It's the nerves.
让我们再试一次。 Let's do it again.
我们还会这样做吗？ We'll do this again?
-等等......-西尔维娅。 -Wait… -Silvia.
谢谢。 Thanks.
等等，西尔维娅！ Wait, Silvia!
根据粗略的计算，在罗马的这个精确时刻......。 According to a rough calculation, at this precise moment in Rome…
我以为你已经放弃了？ I thought you'd given up?
就一个，咖啡后。 Just one, after coffee.
1.5万766对夫妇正在争吵。。 Fifteen thousand 766 couples are arguing.
-这是你的第四次尝试？-那你就把它停好了？ -That's your fourth attempt? -You park it then?
从亚当和夏娃的时代开始，就一直是这样的。 It's been like that since the time of Adam and Eve.
这是不可避免的。把一个男人和一个女人放在一起。 It's inevitable. Put a man and a woman together
而且你可以肯定，迟早会有摩擦。。 and you can be sure that sooner or later there'll be friction.
-今天是我妹妹的生日。-我有足球了。 -It's my sister's birthday. -I've got football.
摩擦导致问题，而问题导致争论，。 And friction leads to problems, and problems to arguments,
和争吵的论据。。 and arguments to fights.
有时，危机在婚礼誓言之前就已经到来。 Sometimes the crisis arrives before the wedding vows.
在这一点上，需要一个奇迹来拯救婚姻。。 At that point it takes a miracle to save the marriage.
或有能力拯救它的人。 Or someone capable of saving it.
我就在这里。 And here I am.
名：贾科波。姓氏：利昂. First name: Jacopo. Surname: Leone.
职业：婚姻顾问。 Profession: marriage counselor.
在我的职业生涯中，我已经阻止了80起离婚案，。 In my career, I have prevented 80 divorces,
12起自杀事件和几起阉割事件。 twelve suicides and a couple of castrations.
莫妮卡是做餐饮工作的某人，这是个口误。 Monica's doing the catering, it was a slip of the tongue.
她是老年人！你是个变态？ She's elderly! You're a pervert?
我们最近谈的都是婚宴。 All we've talked about lately is the wedding reception.
"给莫妮卡打电话。 "Call Monica,
我们必须讨论鱼子酱开胃菜和椰子婚礼礼品的问题。 we have to discuss the caviar canapes, the coconut wedding favors".
在我的工作中，爱情是一门精确的科学。。 In my job, love is an exact science.
你必须了解规则并应用它们。。 You have to know the rules and apply them.
你是个变态，你还责怪我？ You're a pervert and you're blaming me?
然后，当然......绝望的时候，激烈的措施。 Then, of course… Desperate times, drastic measures.
-说点什么吧。-用我们付给她的钱... -Say something. -With what we're paying her…
-爸爸给她钱？-用爸爸给她的钱... -Dad's paying her? -With what Dad's paying her…
她是对的。 She's right.
你是一头猪。 You're a pig.
什么，一头猪？ What, a pig?
一头猪。你需要一个等价物吗？ A pig. Do you need an equivalent?
猪，色鬼，流氓，变态。 Swine, lecher, rogue, pervert.
谢天谢地，我们在教堂里 Thank goodness we're in church
或者我可以说更糟。 or I could say worse.
说实话吧，圭多。 Let's be honest, Guido.
你和做餐饮的女士在一起很开心... You're having fun with the lady doing the catering…
-一个老女人？-做餐饮的老妇人。 -An old woman? -The old woman doing the catering,
而你却在试图让... and you're trying to make out…
-西尔维娅？-西尔维娅很傻？ -Silvia? -That Silvia is stupid?
帮我一个忙。如果我是你，我会走出去。 Do me a favour. I'd walk out if I were you.
别傻了，这是个口误。 Don't be stupid, it was a slip of the tongue.
-你是我生命中的女人。-你不配拥有她这样的女人。 -You're the woman of my life. -You don't deserve a woman like her.
这不是真的，你知道的。我发过多少次誓？ It's not true, you know that. How many times have I sworn?
-等等 -别这样。 -Wait. -Don't be like that.
你会使情况变得更糟。他们都这么说。 You'll make it worse. They all say that.
相信我。 Trust me.
-来吧！-你弄疼我了！ -Come on! -You're hurting me!
-西尔维娅，我爱你。-放过他吧！ -Silvia, I love you. -Leave him alone!
我很抱歉。 I'm sorry.
-甜食派。-甜甜的馅饼。 -Sweetie pie. -Sweetie pie.
这是另一个问题的解决。。 That's another one solved.
没有什么比让女人快乐更美好的了。。 There's nothing nicer than making a woman happy.
可惜总是别人的女人。。 Pity it's always someone else's woman.
如果他没有娶她，我就会去他家...... If he hadn't married her, I'd have gone to his home…
-做得很好!-谢谢你。 -Well done! -Thank you.
-我只是在做我的工作。-做得很好。 -I was only doing my job. -Well done.
-再见了。-你不去吃饭了吗？ -Goodbye. -Aren't you coming to the meal?
-我不能。-你必须这样做。我女儿希望你这样做。 -I can't. -You must. My daughter wants you to.
我很想来，但我不能。 I'd love to come, but I can't.
大米？ Rice?
是的，请。 Yes, please.
怎么样？ Well?
-什么？ -招待会？ -What? -The reception?
-是的，我说过我会来的。-他要来了！ -Yes, I said I'd come. -He's coming!
你能不能不要丢大米了？ Will you stop it with that rice?
-对不起，有人叫我扔了它。-他们还在教堂里。 -Sorry, I was told to throw it. -They're still in church.
你是对的,这里。 You're right. Here.
你扔吧。 You throw it.
你是娜塔莎，对吗？ You're Natasha, right?
我真的很高兴你能来。 I'm really pleased you came.
等我度完蜜月回来再找你。 I'll see you when I get back from my honeymoon.
我会拍一张照片，然后发到Facebook上。你真的很可爱。 I'll take a photo and post it on Facebook. You're really cute.
-我的妻子......-亲爱的! -My wife… -Darling!
我待会儿见。 I'll see you later.
我给它六个月的时间。 I'll give it six months.
对不起？ Sorry?
你做得很好。 You did a great job.
但如果婚姻不成功... But if a marriage doesn't work…
当婚姻不成功的时候，你不能尝试修补它吗？ Can't you repair it when it doesn't work?
这取决于结构。 It depends on the structure.
如果没有地基或承重墙。 If there are no foundations or load-bearing walls,
你不能在其上建造，它将全部倒塌。 you can't build on it, it will all collapse.
工程师？ Engineer?
建筑师。 Architect.
-贾科波。-萨拉。 -Jacopo. -Sara.
很高兴见到你。 Pleased to meet you.
我认为你们辅导员应该有一个行为准则。 I think you counselors should have a code of conduct.
你不应该帮助每一对夫妇。 You shouldn't help every couple.
这很有意思。 That's interesting.
你怎么知道一对夫妇不会长久？ How do you know when a couple isn't going to last?
你可以告诉我。 You can tell.
一个例子？ An example?
看。 Look.
那个靠近窗户的金发女孩。 That blonde girl near the window.
她太漂亮了，不可能如此悲伤。 She's too pretty to be so sad.
他从不和她说话。 He never talks to her.
他们不会走得很远。 They won't go very far.
让我们看看我是否明白这个道理。 Let's see if I get the idea.
让我们来看看... Let's see…
在那里？ There?
看到那对夫妇了吗？ See that couple there?
他是一个非常好的人。 He's a really nice person,
而她则是一个非常让人讨厌的人。 whereas she's an industrial sized pain in the arse.
-非常级别的？-你可以告诉我。 -Industrial sized? -You can tell.
那个 "巨讨厌 "的人是我的朋友。（注：pain in the ass 极其讨厌的人或事物） That "pain in the arse" is my friend.
我不是故意要冒犯你。 I didn't mean to offend you.
这不是一个问题。总之，索菲亚是单身。 It's not a problem. Anyway, Sofia's single.
-索菲亚...-你呢？ -Sofia… -What about you?
我是贾科波。 I'm Jacopo.
我明白了吗？是的，我是单身。绝对单身! I get it? Yes, I'm single. Extremely single!
-为什么？-我可以把你介绍给她。 -Why? -I could introduce you to her.
我宁愿不要，谢谢你。 I'd rather not, thank you.
这就是拯救我婚礼的人。 Here's the man who saved my wedding day.
听着。我的朋友已经订婚8年了。 Listen. My friend has been engaged for eight years,
而且他们已经有九个问题了。和她谈谈。 and they've been having problems for nine. Talk to her.
-怎么样？-谁，他？ -Well? -Who, him?
-他是经典的隐性同性恋者。-他们都是你的同性恋。 -He's the classical crypto-gay. -They're all gay for you.
我很遗憾你遇到了问题。 I'm sorry you're having problems.
到我的办公室来。 Come to my office.
等我把它们印出来，我就把我的名片给你。 I'll give you my card when I get them printed.
有一个毕业聚会... There's a graduation party…
萨拉很美。如果我是一个正常的人， Sara was beautiful. If I'd been a normal person,
我会追着她跑，问她的电话号码。 I would have run after her and asked for her number.
但我不能。 But I couldn't.
都是因为我的诅咒。。 All because of my curse.
是的，这是正确的。。 Yes, that's right.
这一切都始于劳雷塔。我是唯一被邀请参加她聚会的佐罗。 It all started with Lauretta. I was the only Zorro invited to her party.
它本可以成为一个伟大的爱情故事。。 It could have been a great love story.
开火！ Fire!
但结果却是一个灾难性的问题。。 But it turned out to be a burning issue.
然后轮到斯蒂凡妮。 Then it was Stefania's turn.
我已经准备好迎接我的初吻。。 I was ready for my first kiss.
我是如此的兴奋。。 I was so excited.
我真的想引起轰动。。 I really wanted to make a splash.
但她却....... But she made it instead.
Stefania! Stefania!
-别忘了，贾科波。-好自为之。 -Don't forget, Jacopo. -Behave yourselves.
起初我以为是女孩们在招惹麻烦。。 At first I thought it was the girls who attracted trouble.
<但在朱利亚那里，我终于意识到了"炙热的"事实。 But with Giulia I finally realised the scorching truth.
对于我的女友们来说，我就像一个晋级的梯子，一面破镜子，。 For my girlfriends I was like a ladder, a broken mirror,
"13号星期五"，打翻的盐...。 Friday the 13th, spilt salt…
简而言之，我是个扫把星！。 In short, I was a jinx!
唯一好的一面是，在那些灾难中我遇到了法布里奇奥，。 The only good side to it, among those disasters I met Fabrizio,
我最好的朋友。 my best friend.
她对你的唾液过敏。 She's allergic to your saliva.
这没有什么不对。 There's nothing wrong with it.
好吧... Ok…
再有七个案例，我们就以你的名字命名病房。 Seven more cases and we'll name the ward after you.
他在开玩笑。安静! He's joking. Quiet!
-我没听清。那是什么？-我不知道。 -I didn't catch that. What was it? -I don't know.
是吗？ Yes?
我明白了!她说你是阿米巴虫变形虫。 I get it! She said you're an amoeba.
我了解你，你太懒了。 I know you, you're too lazy.
带她出去：去电影院、剧院、吃披萨。 Take her out: to the cinema, theater, for a pizza.
不! No!
-她不喜欢比萨饼吗？-是的，有蘑菇。 -Doesn't she like pizza? -Yes, with mushrooms.
-中国菜？-不! -Chinese food? -No!
没有中国食品。 No Chinese food.
看，她想说的是。 Look, she's trying to say:
"你是一坨屎。 "You're a shit,
滚蛋吧！" get lost!"
亲爱的，你是什么意思？ Darling, what do you mean?
很多女人都会为这款嘴唇花一大笔钱的。 Lots of women would pay a fortune for those lips.
滚一边去！ Fuck off!
我明白了。 I see.
爱情对我来说只是一个专业问题。。 Love for me became merely a professional matter.
如果我没有追赶她，那是为了她自己好。 If I didn't chase after her, it was for her own good.
于是我们都回到了自己的生活中。。 So we all got back to our own lives.
这就够了! That's enough!
你什么都做不好! You can't do anything right!
我不忍心看这个! I can't bear to look at this!
这很可怕。这里已经没有你的位置了。 It's terrible. There's no place for you here anymore.
-我讨厌洛伦萨-布拉。-我也是。 -I hate Lorenza Bra. -So do I.
我有两个硕士文凭，但现在我在干的活却是把树粘在一个比例模型上。 I've two MA's and I'm gluing trees onto a scale model.
-那就想象一下做她的助手吧。-嗯... -Imagine being her assistant then. -Well…
来吧。 Come on.
正是如此。 Precisely.
萨拉，在我的办公室。 Sara, in my office.
我已经尽力了，相信我。 I've tried my best, believe me,
把那个没用的安娜留在我们身边。 to keep that useless Anna here with us,
但平庸又一次取得了胜利。所以... but mediocrity has triumphed yet again. So…
我很抱歉。 I'm sorry.
我并没有问你的意见。 I didn't ask for your opinion.
我儿子从维罗纳打电话来。我们有一个大项目的合同。 My son called from Verona. We have a contract for a big project.
一个新的圣婴耶稣教堂。 A new Infant Jesus church.
所以，虽然很不情愿。 So, though reluctantly,
我被迫任命一个新的助手。 I'm forced to appoint a new assistant.
你。 You.
所以这并不容易。 So it won't be easy,
但我们可以成功。 but we can succeed.
女士，您的丈夫具有支配性人格 Ma'am, your husband has a dominant personality
多年来一直压制着你。 that has crushed yours for years.
你必须把所有的怒气都带出来 You have to bring out all the anger
你多年来储存在你体内的。 you have stored up inside you over the years.
她不能够! She's not able to!
不要理会他。相信我。 Ignore him. Trust me.
现在打开 Open up now
并释放自己。好吗？ and free yourself. Ok?
只要准确说出你对你丈夫的看法。 Just say exactly what you think of your husband.
来吧。 Come on.
你有时会很不公平。 You can be very unfair sometimes.
什么？ What?
不公平。 Unfair.
很好。 Good.
再来一点。 A bit more.
甚至有点像... And even a bit of an…
白痴。 idiot.
完美。 Perfect.
再来一点。 A bit more.
愚蠢。 Stupid.
想一想他有多少次不尊重人的行为。 Think of all the times he has been disrespectful.
霸道。 Overbearing.
他总是想走自己的路。 He always wanted his own way.
白痴。 Moron.
白痴。 Idiot.
屁眼。 Asshole.
你他妈的根本不知道。 You've no fucking idea.
事实上，你他妈的从来没有理解过我! In fact, you've never fucking understood me!
有什么好理解的呢？ What's there to understand?
什么？ What?
我应该明白你是个混蛋！ I should have understood you were a shit!
一个无用的狗屎! A useless shit!
我应该马上意识到你是个混蛋！你是个混蛋。 I should have realised straight away you were a shit!
你让我恶心！ You disgust me!
女士... Ma'am…
非常好。 Very good.
再温柔一点少一点... A little more gently. A little less…
对。 Right.
医生，你说得很对。 Doctor, you're quite right.
我很抱歉。 I'm sorry.
只是少了一点。 Just a little less.
糟糕！ Shit!
如果你再跟我说起你那个放荡的秘书。 If you tell me about your slutty secretary again,
我会打爆你的屁股！你明白了吗？ I'll bust your ass! Have you got that?
很完美。这就好了。 Perfect. That's just fine.
你的时间到了。我们将在下周继续进行。 Your hour is up. We'll carry on next week.
-你真臭！-不，我没有。 -You stink! -No, I don't.
你知道，医生，他很臭。 You know, doctor, he stinks.
医生，你确定这种疗法会有效吗？ Doctor, are you sure this therapy will work?
-快走吧，你这个白痴。再见。-再见。 -Get a move on, you idiot. Bye. -Goodbye.
我并不臭。 I don't stink.
我们走吧，你这个白痴。 Let's go, you moron.
让我们看看谁是下一个。 Let's see who's next.
伦泽提。 Renzetti.
那么这里就是你创造奇迹的地方？ This is where you perform miracles then?
你还好吗？ Are you OK?
是的。 Yes.
是的，你好。 Yes. Hi.
在过去的几天里，我一直在想你。 I've thought about you over the last few days.
很好。 Good.
我在想，来这里到底对不对。 I wondered whether it was right to come here or not.
好吧，你做得很好，遵循你的直觉。 Well, you did well to follow your instinct.
-你知道吗？ -我们有大麻烦了。 -You know what? -We're in deep trouble.
帮助我们 Help us!
如果他们上诉，我们会拿出报告，把他们送进监狱。 If they appeal, we'll pull out the report and send them to jail.
你好，我是乔达诺。我不是说你，先生。 Hello, I'm Giordano. I didn't mean you, sir.
挂断电话！ Hang up!
请原谅我，我得走了，我在开会。 Forgive me, I have to go, I'm in a meeting.
我一做完就给你打电话。 I'll call you as soon as I've finished.
一小时后我在法庭上有个听证会。 I have a hearing in court in an hour.
我们可以开始了吗？ Can we get started?
来吧！ Come on!
不错的人。 Nice man.
我们在一起五年了，你知道他为什么不愿意搬过来吗？ We've been together five years and do you know why he won't move in?
-我住得离法院太远。-从我家步行五分钟就到了。 -I live too far from the courts. -It's a five-minute walk from my home.
-你好吗，我亲爱的"斯巴达科"？-他总是在打电话。 -How are you, my dear Spartaco? -He's always on the phone.
他从来没有离开过电话。 He's never off the phone.
总是和客户在一起。 Always with clients.
我们过去经常交谈，他告诉我他的工作。 We used to talk a lot, he'd tell me about his work,
他告诉我他的忧虑，他告诉我他的生活。 about his worries, he'd tell me about his life.
而他会用他的眼睛吞噬我。 And he'd devour me with his eyes.
是的，就像这样。 Yes, just like that.
我们在说什么？ What were we saying?
-你所想的都是工作。-我有吗？你为你的工作而活! -All you think about is work. -I do? You live for yours!
现在事情进展不顺利 Now that things aren't going well
她记得她有男朋友。 she's remembered she has a boyfriend.
我没有得到这个消息。 I didn't get that.
再说一遍。 Say that again.
这是个谎言。我刚刚得到一份重要的工作机会。 That's a lie. I've just been offered an important job at work.
一个重要的工作机会？我可以想象... An important job offer? I can imagine…
别把我惹毛了! Don't piss me off!
请原谅我。 Forgive me.
一个技术问题。 A technical question.
你们经常做爱吗？ Do you make love very often?
-是的 -不是的。 -Yes. -No.
什么？ What?
嗯，经常......让我们说在平均范围内。 Well, often… let's say within the average.
所谓平均值是他的客户的平均服务年限。 The average of his clients serving life.
这仍然是一个平均值。 That's still an average.
律师不在。他刚刚被逮捕！ The lawyer's not available. He's just been arrested!
把它还给我！够了，萨拉！ Give that back! That's enough, Sara!
这就够了! That's enough!
-乔丹诺，你要去哪里？-我走了。 -Giordano, where are you going? -I'm leaving.
当你决定长大后做什么的时候（意指成熟点，别太幼稚），再给我打电话。或者给我发短信。 When you've decided what to do when you grow up, call me. Or text me.
斯巴达科，我告诉过你要呆在家里。 Spartaco, I told you to stay home.
你被软禁了! You're under house arrest!
他已经走了。 He's gone.
我很抱歉。 I'm sorry.
不，我是说真的，我很抱歉。 No, I mean it, I'm sorry.
当突然发生分手时，咨询师会有什么建议？ What does a counselor suggest when there's a sudden break-up?
好的婚姻咨询师的第一条规则：。 First rule of a good marriage counselor:
永远不要和病人约会。。 never go out with a patient.
绝对禁止。 Never.
今天晚上你在做什么？ What are you doing this evening?
这就是。 This is it.
这正是你所需要的。 This is just what you need.
把自己扔下去？ To throw myself off?
要把事情说出来。来这里。 To get things off your chest. Come here.
这很容易。 It's easy.
-轮到你了。-我怎么说呢？ -Your turn. -What do I say?
任何你想要的。 Anything you want.
我的男朋友是个混蛋! My boyfriend is an asshole!
-怎么样？-你是对的，我确实感觉好多了。 -How's that? -You were right, I do feel better.
-做得很好。再试一次。-对。 -Well done. Try again. -Right.
等等... Wait…
我想成为一名蕾丝边! I want to be a lesbian!
不要瞄准。 Don't take aim.
不要瞄准! Don't take aim!
是的! Yeah!
不要欣喜若狂。我讨厌失败。 Don't rejoice. I hate losing.
看这个。 Watch this.
我想要性爱! I want some sex!
我告诉过你我讨厌失败。 I told you I hate losing.
是的，好的，但是... Yes, all right, but…
天啊，这么晚了! God, it's so late!
索菲亚，现在真的很晚了。 Sofia, it's really late.
关我啥事呢？我在度假。 What do I care? I'm on holiday.
我需要帮助。我昨天刚刚和乔达诺争吵完就和另一个男的搞在一起。 I need help. I argued with Giordano yesterday and screwed another guy.
-真是个荡妇！-安静，他在里面。 -What a slut! -Quiet, he's in there.
我以前从来没有做过这样的事情。 I've never done a thing like that before.
是的，好的，大家都是这么说的。 Yeah, OK, that's what they all say.
我必须到办公室去，维罗纳教区项目的人要来。 I have to get to the office, the people from Verona are coming.
你在这里做什么？ What are you doing here?
你是偷偷溜走的？ You were sneaking away?
不，也就是说，我是。 No. That is, I was.
我是说......我有个约会。 I mean… I have an appointment.
而且我不想打扰你。 And I didn't want to disturb you.
你呢？ What about you?
-你要去哪里？-没有。 -Where were you going? -No.
-什么？ -不！ -What? -No!
我也有个约会。我不希望... I have an appointment too. I didn't want…
打扰我，是的。 Disturb me, yes.
-怎么了？-我有一双和它一样的。 -What's up? -I have a pair just like it.
你知道，在匆忙中... You know, in the rush…
我们有很多共同点：工作承诺、内衣... We've a lot in common: work commitments, underwear…
对被束缚的恐惧。 A fear of being tied down.
我们可以吃早餐了吗？ Shall we have breakfast?
不附带任何条件。 No strings attached.
-我迟到了。-忘记我说过的话。 -I'm late. -Forget I said anything.
也许我们可以共进晚餐。 Perhaps we can have dinner.
很好! Great!
我以后再给你打电话。 I'll call you later.
再见。 Bye.
今天晚上... This evening…
我不能等到那时。 I can't wait until then.
你好。 Hello.
图拉诺街。我很着急。 Turano Street. I'm in a hurry.
裴......完美。 Pe… perfect.
图......图拉诺街。 Tu… Turano Street.
地址不明。请重复。 Address unknown. Please repeat.
图......图拉诺街。 Tu… Turano Street.
图尔图拉诺街。如果地址正确，就说是。 Turturano Street. If the address is correct, say yes.
去f... fu... fuc... Go f… fu… fuc…
地址不明。请重复。 Address unknown. Please repeat.
我知道它在哪里。如果你愿意，我可以为你引路。 I know where it is. I can guide you if you want.
-不，我有一个萨... 萨... -卫星导航。 -No, I've got a sa… sa… -Sat Nav.
-我看到了。-为了... -I see. -To…
图拉诺街。 Turano Street.
不，我必须......说出来。 No, I ha… have to… say it.
我不能再浪费任何时间了。我要出去了。 I can't afford to waste any more time. I'm getting out.
有一辆巴士来了。 There's a bus coming.
车门打开。 Car door open.
她是否走进了门？ Did she walk into the door?
我估计。 I reckon.
-早上好。-早上好。 -Good morning. -Good morning.
这是一场恶梦! This is a nightmare!
这取决于你如何看待它。 It depends how you look at it.
和一个漂亮的女人被困在电梯里是我的梦想。 Being stuck in a lift with a pretty woman is my dream.
-别这样，我不会和你上床的。-我没有想到这么多。 -Stop it, I'm not sleeping with you. -I didn't expect that much.
对不起，我说什么了？ I'm sorry, what have I said?
我很抱歉。 I'm sorry.
那就有希望了？ There's hope then?
只是在开玩笑。 Only joking.
多么美好的一天... What a day…
没有任何效果! And nothing works!
周围有人吗？ Is anyone around?
我是。 I am.
你想对我做什么都行。 Do whatever you want with me.
-抬腿。-请。 -Leg up. -Please.
天啊！ Crikey!
我有大骨头。 I've got big bones.
还有细高跟鞋。 And stiletto heels.
主教... Monsignor…
妈妈... Mom…
葡萄酒的质量始于葡萄园。 The quality of a wine starts in the vineyard.
一个侍酒师需要三个值得信赖的朋友。 A sommelier needs three trusty friends:
视线。 sight,
味道... smell…
和味道。 and taste.
这种酒令人反感... This wine's revolting…
你没有想到在你的第一堂课上会有67年的巴罗洛酒？ You didn't expect a Barolo '67 for your first lesson?
没有，但这会让你推迟注册上课。 No, but it puts you off signing up.
这有什么关系呢？ What does it matter?
我们是否在训练成为侍酒师？ Are we training to be sommeliers?
我们有一个不同的目标。 We have a different aim in mind.
为自己说话。 Speak for yourself.
我今晚要和萨拉出去。 I'm going out with Sara tonight.
-再来一次？-是的。 -Again? -Yes.
你也想毁了她吗？ Do you want to ruin her too?
不要担心。 Don't worry.
我没有任何附加条件。她不会有任何危险。 It's no strings attached. She's not in any danger.
好地方。 Nice place.
这正是我所需要的。 Just what I needed.
今天是我生命中最糟糕的一天。 Today was the worst day of my life.
-这是为什么？-一场又一场的灾难。 -Why's that? -One disaster after another.
真的吗？ Really?
怎么了？ What's up?
-什么也没有。-你是什么意思？ -Nothing. -What do you mean?
你脸色苍白了。 You've gone pale.
你还好吗？ Are you OK?
我很好。 I'm fine.
小心点! Watch out!
怎么了？ What's wrong?
对不起，我以为你会伤害自己。 Sorry, I thought you might hurt yourself.
我为什么要伤害自己？ Why should I hurt myself?
因为... Because…
这些事情发生了。 these things happen.
是的，但我必须是不走运的。 Yes, but I'd have to be unlucky.
我们为什么不交换桌子呢？ Why don't we swap tables?
让我们找一张更安静的桌子，不要挡路。 Let's find a quieter table, out of the way.
从这边绕过去。 Go round this way.
-哪里？-这边。 -Where? -This way.
这样更好，更有亲和力。 This is better, it's more intimate.
对不起。 Sorry.
这就对了。 That's right.
对......你说什么？ Right… you were saying?
我在说，今天应该是特别的。 I was saying that today was supposed to be special.
这是第一次，在办公室里... It was the first time that in the office…
你在听我说吗？ Are you listening to me?
在办公室... At the office…
当你把火扑灭时，你看到服务员的表情了吗？ Did you see the waiter's face when you put the fire out?
好吧，我... Ok. I'll…
我将会去。 I'll be going.
你不想进来喝一杯吗？ Don't you want to come in for a drink?
-我......-这并不重要。 -I… -It doesn't matter.
不，我想... No, I'd…
我想。 I'd like to.
这只是... It's just…
萨拉，我需要告诉你一些事情 -- Sara, I need to tell you something--
你想说的是什么？ What is it you wanted to say?
也许我以后会告诉你。 I'll tell you later maybe.
我们的爱情就这样开始了。。 And that's how our love affair began.
一个正常的浪漫，就像许多其他的浪漫一样。 A normal romance, like many others.
浪漫的晚餐。 Romantic dinners.
在市中心购物。 Shopping in the city center.
长时间的自行车骑行。。 Long bicycle rides.
当然还有很多狂野的性爱。。 And lots of wild sex, of course.
但多亏了我，这一切都令人难忘。。 But thanks to me, it was all unforgettable.
亲爱的! Darling!
等等... Wait…
我已经很多年没有和一个男人这么开心了。 I haven't been as happy with a man in years.
或者说是不吉利的。 Or as unlucky.
这不是他的错。 That's not his fault.
我真的很喜欢他。 I really like him.
-你看到布拉夫人的儿子了吗？-谁，米尔科？ -Have you seen Mrs. Bra's son? -Who, Mirko?
-他就像他母亲一样。-是的，但她并没有制造出一个坏男人。 -He's just like his mother. -Yes, she doesn't make a bad man.
作为一个建筑师，她是没有希望的。 As an architect she's hopeless.
她会因为她对教会的计划而被逐出教会。 She'll be excommunicated over her plans for the church.
我希望你没有告诉她这些。 I hope you didn't tell her that.
你疯了吗？ Are you crazy?
我不会拿自己的生命冒险。 I wouldn't risk my life.
来吧，最糟糕的时候已经过去了。 Come on, the worst is over.
天哪，我感觉很好 Goodness, I feel amazing!
他们给了我什么？ What have they given me?
她现在是个瘾君子...... She's a junkie now…
一圈又一圈... Round and round…
我一会儿要去见贾科波。 I'm meeting Jacopo later.
我会让他知道的。 I'll let him know.
-小心点。-小心。 -Careful. -Careful.
在这里等着，我去给你拿X光片。 Wait here, I'll go and get your X-rays.
你认为我们在手术前不能吃东西公平吗？ Do you think it fair we can't eat before our op?
炖好的苹果不会造成任何伤害。 A stewed apple won't do any harm.
还是会这样？ Or will it?
我可以吃点东西吗？ Can I have something to eat?
来吧！ Come on!
你要去哪里？ Where are you going?
请原谅我？ Excuse me?
-我们要去哪里？-去跟外科医生打个招呼。开心吗？ -Where are we going? -To say hi to the surgeon. Happy?
-但我很好。-我可以看到。 -But I'm fine. -I can see that.
真的，我从来没有感觉这么好过。我的状态很好。 Really, I've never felt better. I'm in great shape.
我看得出来，你是个粉碎机。 I can see that, you're a smasher.
外科单位 SURGICAL UNIT
听着，我... Look, I…
-看我们找到了什么？-一个髋关节置换。 -What have we got here? -A hip replacement.
不错哦！提醒我从病房的姐妹那里得到她的电话号码。 Remarkable! Remind me to get her number from the ward sister.
是的，医生。 Yes, doctor.
她的大腿也不赖。 Her thighs aren't bad either.
-手术刀。-手术刀。 -Scalpel. -Scalpel.
法布里奇奥,等等! Fabrizio, wait!
-你找错人了！-贾科波？ -You've got the wrong person! -Jacopo?
放开我！ Let go of me!
漂亮的女孩，做得好。 Pretty girl, well done.
为了她的未来，我必须甩掉她。 I have to ditch her, for her own good.
你今晚可以和我一起去做指压。 You can come to shiatsu with me tonight.
不是另一个这样的课程... Not another of those courses…
你不喜欢它们吗？ Don't you enjoy them?
我不像你。 I'm not like you.
我试图与一个女人建立一些东西。 I try to build something with a woman.
别让我笑。你也是一个爱她们并离开她们的人。 Don't make me laugh. You're a love-'em-and-leave-'em guy too.
是的，但我感到不安。还记得我因为玛格丽特的事有多难过吗？ Yes, but I get upset. Remember how upset I was over Margherita?
等等。玛格丽特... Wait. Margherita…
那个在系鞋带时折断手腕的人？ The one who broke her wrist while tying her shoes?
不，那是劳拉。玛格丽特烧伤了她的耳朵。 No, that was Laura. Margherita burnt her ear.
耳朵的重建？ The ear reconstruction?
你没有错过任何东西。 You didn't miss anything.
你没有把玛格丽特也搞了？ You didn't screw Margherita too?
只有一次。 Only once.
如此令人失望... Such a disappointment…
她是一个令人失望的人？ She's a disappointment?
你看到贾科波有多可爱了吗？ Have you seen how cute Jacopo is?
-如果不是因为他......我们就不会在这里了。 -If it hadn't been for him… -We wouldn't be here.
你是什么意思？ What do you mean?
你难道不知道，他是个扫把星。 Don't you realise, he's a jinx.
-所有事情都出错了。-天啊! -Everything's been going wrong. -Goodness!
不要荒唐了。你在胡说八道。 Don't be absurd. You're talking crap.
你好。 Hi.
我不当电灯泡了。 I'll leave you two on your own.
-事情进展如何？-如此这般... -How are things? -So-so…
听着... Listen…
-我真的很抱歉。-这不是你的错。 -I'm really sorry. -It's not your fault.
嗯，这是我... Well, it is my…
怎么了？ What's up?
听着，我... Listen, I…
我需要告诉你一些事情... I need to tell you something…
我一直想告诉你，但找不到合适的词。 I've been meaning to tell you, but couldn't find the right words.
我也爱你。 I love you too.
这很好，不是吗？ That's good, isn't it?
那就是... That is…
-不......-什么？ -No… -What?
当然了!你来这里不是为了告诉我你爱我。 Of course! You didn't come here to tell me you love me.
-哦，上帝，对不起。算了吧。-我非常喜欢你... -Oh God, sorry. Just forget it. -I like you a lot…
-我真的很喜欢你......你认为我很有趣......。 -I really like you… -And you think I'm amusing…
不要感到尴尬。假装什么都没发生。 Don't be embarrassed. Pretend nothing happened.
不要生气... Don't be angry…
我是来告诉你一些重要的事情......。 I came to tell you something important…
我想你是... I think you're…
好极了。 fantastic.
我不只是说说而已... I'm not just saying that…
你是... You're…
没有你，我就... Without you I'm…
我不能... I can't…
而且你可以说。 And you can tell.
你也可以从情况中看出。 You can tell by the situation too.
每个人都可以看到它。 Everyone can see it.
但这不仅仅是你。即使和其他人一起... But it's not just you. Even with the others…
-其他人呢？-其他的... -The others? -The other…
情况，我没有......你们所有的人......。 situations, where I didn't… All of you…
所以我在想：为什么是我？ So I was wondering: why me?
为什么它发生在我身上？ Why does it happen to me?
我......与你......。 I… with you…
你是美丽的，惊人的... You're beautiful, amazing…
痛苦的疑问是，... The agonizing doubt is that…
这就够了! That's enough!
我想与你分享。 I wanted to share it with you.
也许，和你一起，一个意见......分享自己的想法。 Maybe, with you, an opinion… Sharing one's thoughts.
这就够了。 That's enough.
这他妈的是什么？ What the fuck?
你有没有伤害自己？ Have you hurt yourself?
在这里。 Here.
在医院发生意外后，我认为萨拉需要休息。。 After the hospital mishap, I thought Sara needed a rest.
我建议和我的父母在乡下过周末。。 I suggested a weekend in the country with my parents.
这是个好主意。 It was a great idea.
-他们在乡下住得久吗？-年龄呢？ -Have they lived in the country long? -Ages.
他们买下了这个古老的农舍，并自己对其进行了翻新。 They bought this old farmhouse and renovated it themselves.
"两颗心和一间小屋"。 "Two hearts and a hut".
两颗心，一间小屋，还有罗科。 Two hearts, a hut, and Rocco.
-谁是罗科？-我父母的杂种狗。 -Who's Rocco? -My parents' mongrel.
他们为什么叫他罗科？ Why did they call him Rocco?
别这样！ Stop that!
真是一场恶梦! What a nightmare!
罗科！ Rocco!
你在做什么？ What are you doing?
罗科真的喜欢你。 Rocco really fancies you.
-我已经注意到了。-把它留给我吧。 -I've noticed. -Leave him to me.
-去捡你的球。-谢谢。 -Fetch your ball. -Thanks.
-如果我有一只小狗，你可以拥有它。-我喜欢这样。 -If I have a puppy, you can have it. -I'd like that.
那些是鹳鸟吗？ Are those storks?
他们是我的骄傲。 They're my pride.
LIPU已将他们交给我照顾 LIPU has put them in my care
作为一个重新填充项目的一部分。 as part of a re-population project.
如果不是因为它们，我会感到非常孤独。 I would feel very lonely if it weren't for them.
你已经有了你的妻子。 You've got your wife.
什么？ What?
-你的妻子。-哦，是的，当然。 -Your wife. -Oh, yes, of course.
你能帮助我吗，亲爱的？ Can you help me, love?
我来了，亲爱的。 I'm coming, darling.
-你玩得开心吗？-他们真的很好。 -Are you enjoying yourself? -They're really nice.
多亏了我，他们还在一起。 It's thanks to me they're still together.
-真的吗？-是的。 -Really? -Yes.
当我还是个孩子时，他们几乎分开了。 When I was a kid they almost separated.
我无法忍受这一点。 I couldn't bear that.
我在书店里发现了一本关于婚姻咨询的书。 I found a book on marriage counseling in the bookshop.
我用心学习了... I learnt it by heart…
我在他们身上做了第一次咨询。 and I did my first counseling on them.
我做得再好不过了 I couldn't have done a better job.
罗科，不！ Rocco, no!
嘿! Hey!
终于到了。你在哪里？你还好吗？ At last. Where are you? You OK?
我很好。 I'm fine.
我甚至为维罗纳的教堂画了几幅草图。 I've even done a couple of sketches for the church in Verona.
我已经有了一些想法。 I've had some ideas.
阻止它？ Stop that?
你在和谁说话？ Who are you talking to?
某个不肯放过我的野兽。 Some randy beast who won't leave me alone.
他几乎不是第一个。。 He's hardly the first.
我在网上查了一下。 I looked it up on the Internet.
在意大利，一千人中有一人是扫把星。 In Italy, one person in a thousand is a jinx.
这使得罗马有3000人。。 That makes 3,000 in Rome.
你的朋友可能是他们中的一员。 Your friend could be one of them.
你会放弃这个话题吗？ Will you drop the subject?
你处于危险之中。趁现在还不晚，赶紧离开。 You're in danger. Get out before it's too late.
捡球! Fetch the ball!
购买一些意外保险！。 Take out some insurance against accidents!
我很抱歉。我不知道该说些什么。 I'm sorry. I don't know what to say.
那就不要说什么了。 Don't say anything then.
不要担心。房子是有保险的。 Don't worry. The house is insured.
我们现在已经习惯了。 We're used to it by now.
习惯了吗？ Used to it?
是的。贾科波有一个习惯，就是选择那些相当不走运的女人。 Yes. Jacopo has a habit of choosing women who are rather unlucky.
真的吗？ Really?
她们在遇到你之前是不是很不走运？ Were they unlucky before they met you?
这就对了。 That did it.
我背对着墙。。 I had my back to the wall.
我必须告诉她真相，全部真相，。 I had to tell her the truth, the whole truth,
除了真相，别无其他。。 and nothing but the truth.
我告诉她一切：。 I told her everything:
劳雷塔的生日，斯蒂凡妮的鼻中隔。。 Lauretta's birthday, Stefania's nasal septum.
Giulia和她屁股上的皮肤移植。卡米拉，安娜玛利亚，。 Giulia and the skin transplant on her bottom. Camilla, Annamaria,
弗拉维亚、玛塔......所有的人。。 Flavia, Marta… All of them.
但这怎么可能呢？ But how can that be possible?
倒霉的。 Jinxed.
简直是倒霉透顶。 Simply jinxed.
我知道，但一定有原因的。 I know, but there has to be a reason.
这一切都发生在很久以前。 It all happened a long time ago.
初中的最后一年。 The last year at junior school.
他现在完全无视我。 He completely ignores me now.
我已经开始了我的咨询。。 I had already started my consultations.
拒绝对方，有被抛弃的感觉... Denial of the other, feelings of abandonment…
非常有趣。 Very interesting.
他甚至说我是一个糟糕的接吻者。 He even says I'm a bad kisser.
灌输内疚的感觉。 Instillation of feelings of guilt.
你告诉我如何接吻。 You tell me how I kiss.
-你在做什么？-西蒙娜... -What are you doing? -Simona…
-这不是你想的那样。-你太恶心了！ -It's not what you think. -You're disgusting!
-让我解释一下。-贾科波，你会为此付出代价的。 -Let me explain. -Jacopo, you'll pay for this.
我将诅咒你，直到永远。 I will curse you for ever and ever.
阿门。 Amen.
你后来见过西蒙娜吗？ Have you seen Simona since?
她已经消失了。 She's vanished.
几年前我试着找过她。 I tried looking her up a few years ago,
来要求她消除诅咒。 to ask her to remove the curse.
但是不幸找不到。 But no luck.
有人告诉我她去国外生活了。 Someone told me she's gone to live abroad.
那么？ So?
也许我们最好把它全部取消。 Perhaps it's better if we call it all off.
这是个抛弃我的好借口。我以前没有听说过这句话。 That's a good excuse to ditch me. I've not heard that one before.
我不是在开玩笑。如果你和我在一起，你将永远处于危险之中。 I'm not joking. If you're with me, you'll always be in danger.
我喜欢危险! I love danger!
探戈是纯粹的激情。 The tango is pure passion.
用你的眼睛寻找你的伴侣。 Seek out your partner with your eyes.
法布里奇奥。 Fabrizio,
这些人很痴迷，她们让我害怕。 these people are obsessed, they scare me.
这是我来的最后一个课程。 This is the last course I'm coming on.
多么甜蜜啊，他恋爱了。 How sweet, he's in love.
-你认为它能持续多久？-现在你是个扫把星了。 -How long do you think it'll last? -Now you're being a jinx.
-你想知道真相吗？-那是什么？ -Do you want to know the truth? -What is it?
-再来两次灾难，再见萨拉。-请不要! -Two more disasters and goodbye Sara. -Please don't!
我有解决办法。 I have the solution.
那是什么？ What's that?
来到这里。 Come here.
不，不是算命先生。请带我回家! No, not a fortune teller. Please, take me home!
-他不是一个算命先生。-那他是什么呢？ -He's not a fortune teller. -What is he then?
佐鲁斯是一个神秘学的实践者。 Zorus is a practitioner of the occult.
更多的是心理上的问题。 A more psychological one.
你怎么能把我带到一个叫佐鲁斯的人面前？ How can you bring me to a guy called Zorus?
我姐姐说他很好。 My sister says he's good.
她和她的丈夫有一个问题，在与他的一次谈话中。 She and her husband had a problem, and in one sitting with him,
它被解决了。 it was solved.
你的姐夫？ Your brother-in-law?
他不是在六个月前死于一场交通事故吗？ Didn't he die in a road accident six months ago?
那怎么办？这些事情发生了。 What about it? These things happen.
是的，但是... Yes, but…
轮到你了。 It's your turn.
-我们走吧，我很害怕。-走吧！ -Let's go, I'm scared. -Go on!
-我很害怕。-他知道一切。 -I'm scared. -He knows everything.
-他什么都知道？-是的。 -He knows everything? -Yes.
谁在那里？ Who's there?
你是什么意思？ What do you mean?
我以为他什么都知道。 I thought he knew everything.
是我，佐鲁斯先生。 It's me, Mr. Zorus.
你好。 Hello.
你来这里是为了什么？ What are you here for?
我被魔鬼附身了。 I'm possessed by the devil.
我明白了。 I see.
佐鲁斯先生... Mr. Zorus…
你死了吗？ Are you dead?
-我正在集中精力。-对不起。 -I'm concentrating. -Sorry.
-它看起来像... -什么... -It looked like… -What…
诅咒你的那个孩子的名字是什么？ is the name of the child who put the curse on you?
-西蒙娜。-我知道。 -Simona. -I know.
你的问题起源于西蒙娜对你的诅咒。 Your problem originates with the curse Simona put on you.
我知道这一点。 I knew that.
-我不需要算命的人。-我不是一个算命的人。 -I don't need a fortune teller. -I'm not a fortune teller.
我是一个神秘学的实践者。 I'm a practitioner of the occult.
这就对了。 That's right.
为了摆脱诅咒，我们必须做一个仪式。 To get rid of the curse, we have to do a ritual.
你必须把我... You have to bring me…
西蒙娜。 Simona.
我不能这样做。我已经30年没见过她了。 I can't. I haven't seen her for 30 years.
-我不知道该去哪里找。-好吧。 -I wouldn't know where to look. -All right.
这并不重要。 It doesn't matter.
一绺头发就可以了。 A lock of hair will do.
好吧，如果你有一些剪刀，我们现在就做。 Ok. If you've got some scissors, we'll do it now.
不是你的，是西蒙娜的。 Not yours, Simona's.
你不明白，是吗？ You don't get it, do you?
你可能是一个神秘主义的实践者。 You might be a practitioner of the occult,
但我不知道她或她的头发在哪里。 but I don't know where she or her hair is.
这并不重要。我们将进行一个特殊的仪式。 It doesn't matter. We'll perform a special ritual.
有一点额外的费用。 With a little extra charge.
多少钱？ How much?
五百欧元。 Five hundred euros.
-你把这叫做一点额外的东西？-我也要谋生，伙计。 -And you call that a little extra? -I have to earn a living too, mate.
现在... Now…
让我们为仪式做好准备。 let's get ready for the ritual.
-你在哪里？-在厨房里。 -Where are you? -In the kitchen.
-这闻起来不错。-这是minestrone.。 -That smells nice. -It's minestrone.
但我想出去庆祝。 But I wanted to go out and celebrate.
庆祝什么？ Celebrate what?
我在楼梯上发现了这些。 I found these on the stairs.
两百欧元？ Two hundred euros?
真的吗？ Really?
而且这还不是全部。我甚至在外面找到了一个停车位。 And that's not all. I even found a parking space outside.
在第一次去的时候。以前从未发生过。 At first go. Never happened before.
真想不到，佐鲁斯... Fancy that, Zorus…
-你说什么？-很难找到一个停车位。 -What did you say? -It's hard to find a parking space.
有时甚至摩托车也是如此。 Even for motorbikes sometimes.
我们必须要庆祝。 We have to celebrate.
它没有破损! It didn't break!
令人惊讶的是，最好的解决方案往往是最简单的。。 It's amazing how often the best solution is often the simplest.
-这里。-达林... -Here. -Darling…
你想消除一个诅咒？ You want to remove a curse?
去找算命先生。很简单，不是吗？ Go to the fortune teller. Easy, no?
你在做什么？ What are you doing?
我去看了一个项目，为一个教堂做的。 Going over a project I did, for a church.
它很美。 It's beautiful.
真的吗？ Really?
嗯，我不是专家，但我认为它很可爱。 Well, I'm no expert but I think it's lovely.
是这样想的吗？ Think so?
是的，看看它有多好。它甚至有停放的汽车。 Yes, look how nice it is. It's even got parked cars.
来吧！ Come on!
我把它们放进去是为了让人们更好地了解比例。 I put them in to give a better idea of the proportions.
-我不知道。-现在你知道了。 -I didn't know that. -Well you do now.
露胸罩的夫人怎么说？ What does Mrs. Bra say?
我甚至还没有给她看过。 I haven't even shown it her.
那么就这样做吧。 Then do so.
-不 -为什么不呢？ -No. -Why not?
她明天下午要介绍自己的项目。这已经太晚了。 She's presenting her own project tomorrow afternoon. It's too late.
明天下午。早上给她看。 Tomorrow afternoon. Show it to her in the morning.
去布拉夫人的地方。 Go to Mrs. Bra's place,
并按下对讲机... and ring the intercom…
Bra......Bra......。 Bra… bra…
"胸罩Bra "很糟糕。我做不到。 "Bra bra" sucks. I can't do it.
那就敲敲她的门吧。 Knock on her door then.
"布拉夫人，要乖。 "Mrs. Bra, be good.
看看我用这么多的爱绘制的计划。 Look at the plans I drew with so much love.
我甚至把一些停放的汽车放在里面。" I've even put some parked cars in it."
我把这个拿回去。这是你的电脑。 I'll take this back. This is your computer.
-我们会忘记一切。-这很美。 -And we'll forget all about it. -It's beautiful.
这是一个很好的机会。 It's a great opportunity.
-你必须给她看。-有还是没有停放的汽车？ -You have to show it to her. -With or without parked cars?
有了。 With.
-你担心吗？-有一点。 -Are you worried? -A little.
你会好起来的。 You'll be fine,
我就是知道这一点。 I just know it.
那是一个轮子吗？ Is that a wheel?
是的。 Yes.
不，我们不能移动汽车。 No, we can't move the car.
它在漏水，从冷却器里漏的。 It's leaking water, but from the drinking fountain.
好吧，我就在这里等。 All right, I'll wait here.
我不明白... I don't understand…
你不明白，但... You don't understand, but…
已经很晚了。 It's late.
对不起，我将乘坐地铁，我迟到了。 I'm sorry, I'll take the underground, I'm late.
不要担心。 Don't worry.
小册子准备好了吗？ Are the brochures ready?
快点吧，伙计们？我们必须在梵蒂冈待上四天？ Hurry up, guys? We have to be at the Vatican for four?
他们来了。他们准备好了。很好。 Here they are. They were ready. Good.
你在哪里？ Where were you?
我很抱歉我迟到了。 I'm sorry I'm late.
如果你把自己打扮得漂亮，那是值得的。 If you were making yourself pretty, it was worth it.
-洛伦莎在哪里？-我建议你不要打扰她。 -Where's Lorenza? -I advise you not to disturb her.
她正在恢复。她的脾气很坏。 She's being restored. She's in a bad temper.
-我能说句话吗？-当然可以。 -Can I have a word? -Of course.
你的问题显然是缺乏性和谐。 Your problem is obviously a lack of sexual harmony.
爱就在那里。 The love is there.
你们只需添加... You just have to add…
一点点 "胡椒粉" a bit of "pepper"
对你们的关系。 to your relationship.
-这是一部色情电影吗？-是的。 -Is it a porn film? -Yes.
为了治疗的目的。我希望这不会冒犯到你。 For therapeutic purposes. I hope it doesn't offend you.
不，我有一种迷恋。 No, I have a fixation.
你有一种迷恋？ You have a fixation?
几年前。 Years ago.
他们现在让我有点恼火。 They irritate me a bit now.
你必须一起看，而不是自己一个人看。 You have to watch it together, not on your own.
在一起。 Together.
你事后会感谢我的。 You'll thank me afterwards.
妈妈，是我。 Mom, it's me.
进来吧，亲爱的。 Come in, darling.
你好。 Hello.
她在这里做什么？ What's she doing here?
萨拉有一个建议。 Sara has a proposal to make.
我现在没有时间。 I don't have time right now.
只要五分钟。 Just five minutes.
她对教会有一个惊人的想法。 She has an amazing idea for the church.
她？别让我笑，会让我长皱纹的。 Her? Don't make me laugh, it'll give me wrinkles.
-你可以走了。-她是在开玩笑。 -You may go. -She's joking.
-现在。-她不是在开玩笑。 -Now. -She isn't joking.
-这不是真的，我是攻的。-不是。 -It's not true I'm intrusive. -No.
-我没有打扰。-不要大喊大叫？ -I'm not intrusive. -Don't shout?
我总是尊重你的隐私。 I always respect your privacy.
什么，你用我的电子邮件写信给马可... What? You wrote to Marco with my email…
-谢谢你。-不客气。 -Thank you. -You're welcome.
这他妈的是什么？ What the fuck?
我很抱歉，神父。 I'm sorry, father.
对不起？我认识你吗？ Sorry? Do I know you?
祝您有一个愉快的一天。 Have a nice day.
如果你把我介绍给你的朋友。 If you introduced me to your friends,
如果我们在城里的时候，我不觉得自己是个陌生人... if I didn't feel a stranger when we're in the city…
别烦我了好吗？我甚至要征求你的同意才能小便。 Get off my back? I even have to ask your permission to pee.
我还不如给自己找一个女人。 I might as well have got myself a woman.
-对吗，医生？-真的... -Right, doctor? -Really…
比方说... Let's say…
实际上... Actually…
请原谅我。 Forgive me.
这是个病人。 It's a patient.
-喂？ -会是谁呢？ -Hello? -Who can it be?
-你看？你是攻？-医生？ -You see? You are intrusive? -Doctor?
我是斯塔法罗尼。你好。 This is Staffaroni. Hello.
-告诉我。-关于那个DVD... -Tell me. -About that DVD…
也许我们有点太传统了。 Perhaps we're a little too traditional,
但这些教会并没有让我们感到那么兴奋。 but these churches don't arouse us that much.
教会？ Churches?
我马上过来。 I'll be right over.
你是个神经病。 You're a psychopath.
-你是一个......--圣洁的荡妇! -You're a… -Holy slut!
这就对了!一个荡妇！ That's right! A slut!
-奴隶？-是的，我做所有的家务。 -Slave? -Yes, I do all the housework.
-我打扫浴室。-它很小! -I clean the bathroom. -It's tiny!
-谁负责洗碗？-谁做饭？ -Who does the dishes? -Who cooks?
你用了那么多油，它就会被结壳。 With all the oil you use, it gets encrusted.
-我应该在地板上做饭吗？-少用油! -Shall I cook on the floor? -Use less oil!
就像在黑暗时代。 Like in the dark ages.
-请原谅我。-那是什么？ -Excuse me. -What is it?
我想知道我是否可以和你谈谈我的项目... I was wondering if I could talk to you about my project…
不要怀疑，为你自己好。 Don't wonder, for your own good.
萨拉，接听你的电话！ Sara, answer your phone!
这个萨拉是谁？ Who is this Sara?
一定是个女人。 Must be a woman.
真的... Really…
请原谅我，我得走了。 Forgive me, I have to go.
这是一个紧急情况。 It's an emergency.
-你看？那是个女人。-我告诉过你。 -You see? It was a woman. -I told you so.
-你有一辆摩托车吗？-是的。 -Have you got a motorbike? -Yes.
我需要它。 I need it.
谢谢。 Thanks.
荡妇！ Slut!
嫉妒了。 Jealous.
上午好。 Good morning.
尊敬的阁下。 Your Eminence.
再次见到你真是太好了。 How nice to see you again.
您旅行顺利吗？ Did you have a good trip?
这很好。 It was fine.
我们可以开始了吗？ May we begin?
是的，当然了。 Yes, of course.
妈妈，把你的武器藏起来，我们是为和平而来。 Mom, hide your weapons, we come in peace.
-这是你的教会光盘。-是的，我星期五见你。 -Here are your churches. -Yes, I'll see you on Friday.
在星期五。 On Friday.
我所设计的教堂是现代性和传统性的结合。 The church I have designed is a mixture of modernity and tradition.
材料的现代性。 Modernity of the materials,
空间的使用和礼拜场所的理念。 the use of the spaces and the idea of the place of worship.
符号和形状中的传统。 Tradition in the symbols and shapes.
在维罗纳的传统的形状中。 Among the shapes of the traditions of Verona,
我选择了最经典和最容易识别的。 I chose the most classical and most recognizable.
考虑到这是一座献给圣婴耶稣的教堂。 Considering it's a church to the Infant Jesus,
最有圣诞气氛的。 the most Christmasy.
这是什么垃圾？ What is this garbage?
这是个圣诞蛋糕。 It's a Christmas cake.
那你怎么看？ What do you think then?
你是在开玩笑吗？ You are joking?
没有，为什么？ No. Why?
-我们要求的是一个教堂。-而不是一个具体的圣诞蛋糕。 -We asked for a church. -Not a concrete Christmas cake.
尊敬的阁下。 Your Eminence,
也许这个创新的设计让你大吃一惊。 perhaps the innovative design has caught you by surprise.
也许。 Perhaps.
我很抱歉，但是对于我们的教会来说，我们需要一些... I'm sorry, but for our church we need something…
确切地说，是更加古典。 decidedly more classical.
下一次也许吧。 Next time maybe.
不，等等。 No! Wait.
是的，等等。 Yes, wait.
我们有另一种设计。 We have another design.
一个决定性的更... One that is decidedly more…
古典。 classical.
这是我自己提出的一个想法。 It's an idea I worked on myself.
你能再给我们五分钟时间吗？ Can you give us five more minutes?
请讲。 Go ahead.
对不起，嬷嬷，请问艺术馆在哪？ Excuse me, sister, the Art Gallery?
从这里很难给你带路。 It's hard to direct you from here.
-我带你过去。-谢谢你。 -I'll take you there. -Thank you.
-你会带我去吗？-我就是这么说的，我的孩子。 -You'll take me? -That's what I said, my son.
但我的坐骨神经痛正在发作。更不用说我的大腿骨了。 But my sciatica is playing up. Not to mention my thigh-bone.
不，我们不要提它。 No, let's not mention it.
对。我们现在可以开始了。 Right. We can start now.
正如你所看到的，它前面有一个简短的介绍。 As you can see, it is preceded by a short introduction.
正如你所看到的... As you can see…
-不！ -这个女孩... -No! -This girl…
代表今天的年轻人。 represents the young people of today.
教会喜欢帮助的年轻人。 The young people the Church likes to help out.
-我们还有很长的路要走吗？-没有。 -Have we far to go? -No.
-就在那边。-在那里？ -It's over there. -Over there?
你在做什么？放我下来！ What are you doing? Put me down!
正如你所看到的，这是一个项目，... As you can see, it's a project that…
它既是国际性的，又是多种族的。 is both international and multiracial.
哦，我的天啊 Oh my God!
这里就是。 This is it.
尊敬的阁下... Your Eminence…
这是不可容忍的! This is intolerable!
你真无耻! Shame on you!
还是在圣地？ In a holy place too?
主教大人，我很震惊。 Your Eminence, I'm appalled.
我不知道怎么会发生这样令人遗憾的事情。 I don't know how such a regrettable thing could have happened.
萨拉，我很抱歉。 Sara, I'm sorry.
-现在你相信我了吗？-也许吧，贾科波。 -Now do you believe me? -Perhaps, Jacopo.
我这里有你的项目。 I have your project here.
-保留它!-他们可能需要它。 -Keep it! -They might need it.
这就够了。 That's enough.
够了! Enough!
我希望你从我的生活中消失。 I want you out of my life.
妈妈，这一次我拒绝听你的。 Mom, this time I refuse to listen to you.
我们不能错过这个机会。 We can't afford to miss this opportunity.
-你要去杰科波家吗？-不，都结束了。 -Are you going to Jacopo's? -No, it's all over.
终于有了一些好消息!对不起。 Some good news at last! Sorry.
萨拉。 Sara.
-我跟我母亲说了。-谢谢，但她解雇我是对的。 -I spoke to my mother. -Thanks, but she was right to fire me.
我设法安排了另一次会议，向他们展示你的计划。 I managed to arrange another meeting to show them your plan.
真实的是。 The real one.
另一个企画有其自身的吸引力。 Though the other one had its own appeal.
你还没有看到它。 You haven't seen it yet.
我喜欢你。我喜欢你的工作方式。 I like you. I like the way you work.
我相信会好起来的。 I'm sure it will be fine.
-你妈妈是怎么接受的？-她非常高兴。 -How did your mom take it? -She's very happy.
甚至是热情的。 Enthusiastic even.
来吧，萨拉，开始工作。 Come on, Sara, get to work.
我开始在他身上下功夫了。 I'd get to work on him.
一旦和萨拉的事情结束，我决定要休息一下。 Once it was over with Sara, I decided I needed a break.
惊喜! Surprise!
我很伤心，很痛苦，很失败。。 I was sad, embittered, defeated.
妈妈! Mom!
幸运的是，还有一个人可以拯救我。。 Fortunately there was still someone I could take refuge with.
唯一会爱我一生的人。。 The only people who would love me all my life.
他们一定在楼上。 They must be upstairs.
同时也是我职业成功的成就来源。。 As well as being my greatest professional success.
贾科波！ Jacopo!
我可以解释一切... I can explain everything…
亲爱的，不要把它放在心上。 Darling, don't take it to heart.
这不是那么严重。 It's not that serious.
-你在为他撑腰吗？-这不是你想的那样。 -Are you sticking up for him? -It's not what you think.
-不？-没有。 -No? -No.
那么它是什么呢？ What is it then?
还记得你还是个孩子的时候，你试图让我们在一起吗？ Remember when you were a child and you tried to keep us together?
是的。那它是什么？ Yes. What about it?
我们非常感动... We were so moved…
我们不想伤害你。 we didn't want to hurt you.
所以我们告诉你，我们已经关系变好了。 So we told you we'd made it up.
但我们会秘密地争论。 But we'd argue in secret.
我们都有自己的秘密情人。 We both had our affairs.
秘密情人？ Affairs?
你也是吗，妈妈？ You too, Mom?
特别是她。 Especially her.
男人看上我不是我的错...... It's not my fault men fancy me…
扔掉这个话题。 Drop the subject.
你离开家后，一切都变了。 Everything changed when you left home.
妈妈搬到了马可家。 Mom moved in with Marco.
她只有在你访问时才会回来。你总是先让我们知道。 She only comes back when you visit. You always let us know first.
马可? Marco?
他是一个非常好的人。 He's a really nice person.
而你之前看到的那位女士是阿德里安娜。 Whereas the lady you saw before is Adriana.
阿德里亚娜... Adriana…
马可... Marco…
真是太好了! Just great!
是每个人吗？ Is that everybody?
这并没有持续很久，但我也和一个阿尔贝托约会过。 It didn't last long, but I dated an Alberto too.
我是在讽刺。 I was being sarcastic.
讽刺。 Sarcastic.
但这并不能改变什么。 But it doesn't change anything.
妈妈会永远爱你。 Mom will always love you.
妈妈？ Mom?
-那爸爸呢？-是的，爸爸也是。 -What about Dad? -Yes, Dad too.
-总是妈妈！-还有爸爸！ -It's always Mom! -And Dad!
-妈妈，妈妈......爸爸不算数。-你是什么意思？ -Mom, Mom… Dad doesn't count. -What do you mean?
-你应该谨慎行事！-慎重？ -You should have been discreet! -Discreet?
-是的，这就对了。-要我说出更多的名字吗？ -Yes, that's right. -Shall I name more names?
Rosco, Orso, Lapo... Rosco, Orso, Lapo…
-我也有一些名字！-请！ -I have some names too! -Please!
我的生活只是一大堆谎言。。 My life was just a huge pile of lies.
我完美的父母，。 My perfect parents,
我可悲地试图与一个女人在一起，假装我是正常的......。 my pathetic attempts to be with a woman pretending I was normal…
他的情况更糟。 He's got worse.
更不用说我对病人说的那些谎言了。 Not to mention the lies I told my patients.
-就像她的妈妈。-别把她扯进来！ -Like her mom. -Leave her out of this!
是时候阻止它了。。 It was time to stop it.
-她很容易成为目标。-你看？ -She's an easy target. -You see?
分手吧。 Split up.
什么？ What?
分手吧。 Split up.
在为时已晚之前。 Before it's too late.
这是个战术。像上次一样？ It's a tactic. Like last time?
这是毫无意义的。 It's pointless.
你们只是在浪费你们的时间。 You're just wasting your time.
你们总是会争吵。 You'll always argue.
你们将继续仇恨对方并停止语言交流。 You will carry on feeding your hatred and stop speaking.
然后那个曾经是你活着的理由的人 And then the person who used to be your reason for living
将成为你最大的敌人。 will become your worst enemy.
而离婚将是一种解放。 And divorce will be a liberation.
你们的问题的结束？ The end of your problems.
但不！这将只是他们的开始。 But no! It will only be the start of them.
律师，孩子的监护权。 Lawyers, custody of the children,
维修费。 maintenance payments,
惊恐发作、镇静剂。 panic attacks, tranquilizers,
而且，最后，也许会有一场漂亮的自杀。也许吧! and, in the end, maybe a nice suicide. Maybe!
你不是要成为夫妻的一部分。 You're not meant to be part of a couple.
我们中没有人天生就是夫妻中的一员。 None of us is born to be part of a couple.
我们生来就是为了自由和孤独。 We are born to be free and alone.
而我们必须保持孤独。 And alone we must remain.
接受我的建议。 Take my advice.
我是情侣方面的专家! I'm an expert on couples!
你的时间到了。那是80欧元。 Your hour's up. That's 80 euros.
我们已经为残疾人提供了三个通道的坡道。 We've provided three access ramps for the disabled.
就这样了。你有什么问题吗？ And that's it. Have you any questions?
疑问？ Doubts?
优秀的工作。 Excellent job.
这座教堂将成为维罗纳教区的一个骄傲。 This church will be a source of pride for the Verona Diocese.
惊人的项目。他们很热情。 Amazing project. They were enthusiastic.
为一长串的成功中的第一个成功干杯。 To the first in a long series of successes.
-但愿如此吧。-我很肯定。 -Let's hope so. -I'm sure of it.
我不知道怎么感谢你才好。 I can't thank you enough.
你已经有了。 You already have.
通过出来吃饭。 By coming out to dinner.
我们最好现在就走。 We'd better go now.
-你很无聊吗？-不，我有点累。 -Are you bored? -No, I'm a little tired.
知道我们到时要做什么吗？我们将在我的地方吃甜点。 Know what we'll do then? We'll have dessert at my place.
我住在中心。顶层公寓，舒适的长沙发，我，你，风景...... I live in the center. Penthouse flat, comfy divan, me, you, the view…
我们可以放松。 We can relax.
-晚上好。-晚上好。 -Good evening. -Good evening.
去哪里？ Where to?
请到机场去。 To the airport, please.
两百八十五天后 TWO HUNDRED 85 DAYS LATER
在徘徊了几个月之后，。 After wandering around for months,
我找到了适合我的地方。 I had found just the place for me.
爱琴海中的一个孤岛。。 An isolated island in the Aegean.
总人数：7人。。 Total population: seven men.
平均年龄：83岁。 Average age: 83.
没有机会遇到女性的人。。 No chance of meeting anyone of the female sex.
除了一只山羊。 Apart from a goat.
但她不是我的菜。 But she wasn't my type.
我终于找到了一丝平静。。 I had finally found a bit of peace.
妈妈？ Mom?
你在这里做什么？ What are you doing here?
你迷路了吗？ Are you lost?
我没有迷路，我只是在寻找我的母亲。 I'm not lost, I am only looking for my mother.
我不想和你说话。 I don't want tot talk to you.
这就对了。 That's right.
我们去找你的父母吧。 Let's go and look for your parents.
这家伙什么都不懂！ This guy doesn't understand anything!
不要恼火，我不理解你。 Don't get annoyed, I don't understand you.
你妈妈在哪里？ Where's your mom?
- 妈妈!- 你到哪里去了，我的爱人？ - Mom! - Where have you been my love?
女士，他没有受到伤害。再见。 Ma'am, he came to no harm. Goodbye.
你是意大利人吗？ Are you Italian?
是的。 Yes.
艾萨克，按照妈妈教你的方法感谢这位先生。 Isaac, thank this gentleman the way Mommy taught you to.
谢谢你，先生，让我回来了。 Thank you, sir, for bringing me back.
-你会说意大利语吗？-我们是意大利人，他父亲是丹麦人。 -Do you speak Italian? -We're Italian, his father's Danish.
我一直在努力... I've been trying to…
-贾科波？-是的。 -Jacopo? -Yes.
我不相信!30年了，你还是没变。 I don't believe it! 30 years and you haven't changed.
什么意思？ In what way?
是我，西蒙娜。 It's me, Simona.
你不记得了吗？我们初中时是同学。 Don't you remember? We were at junior school together.
贾科波，你会为此付出代价的。。 Jacopo, you'll pay for this.
我会诅咒你，直到永远。 I'll curse you for ever and ever.
Simona!是她！ Simona! It was her!
我所有浪漫灾难的根源！。 The root of all my romantic disasters!
我终于找到了她。 I'd found her at last.
西蒙娜，你和我需要谈谈。 Simona, you and I need to talk.
请原谅我，但我发现这一切真的很有趣。 Forgive me, but I find all this really funny.
你毁了我的生活，并认为这很有趣？ You ruined my life and think it funny?
我甚至都不记得这个诅咒了。 I don't even remember this curse.
-你一定要记得！-我们在初中的时候! -You must! -We were in junior school!
我记得我们是一对恋人，然后发生了一些事情。 I remember we were sweethearts, then something happened.
想想看，如果我们还在一起，那将是多么无聊的事情啊! Think what a bore it'd be if we were still together!
多么令人厌烦啊! What a bore!
-烦人？-来吧！ -A bore? -Come on!
你是无可救药的。 You're incorrigible.
我现在和一位海洋生物学家在一起。 I'm with a marine biologist now.
我们在地中海周围旅行。 We travel around the Mediterranean.
而且他很喜欢我的儿子。这很完美。 And he adores my son. It's perfect.
你快乐吗？ Are you happy?
是的。 Yes.
它甚至可能无法持续。 It might not even last.
但这就是生活，事情会发生变化。 But that's life, things change.
这个扫把星业务是不与某人捆绑在一起的借口吗？ Is this jinx business an excuse not to get tied down with someone?
什么？ What?
也许你害怕放手，害怕受到伤害......。 Perhaps you're afraid of letting go, being hurt…
你有没有告诉过萨拉你爱她？ Have you ever told Sara you love her?
失陪一下。 Excuse me a minute.
{an8}40个新的短信 FORTY NEW MESSAGES
<嗨，贾科波，是我。法布里齐奥告诉我你已经离开了。 Hi, Jacopo, it's me. Fabrizio told me you'd gone away.
我真的需要和你谈谈。 I really need to talk to you.
你能给我回电话吗？ Can you call me back?
我得到了晋升。 I got a promotion.
工作进展得很好。 Work's going just great.
如果不是你强迫我给他们看我的计划，我永远不会这么做。 If you hadn't forced me to show them my plans, I never would.
你会给我回电话吗？ Will you call me back?
请！ Please!
我很傻。 I was stupid.
贾科波，回来吧。 Jacopo, come back.
我已经投保了一些意外保险。 I've taken some insurance out for accidents.
而且我意识到了一些重要的事情。 And I've realised something important.
我最大的不幸是没有你。 My greatest misfortune is being without you.
但我不能永远等待。 But I can't wait forever.
我不会再给你打电话了。。 I'm not calling you again.
我很抱歉。 I'm sorry.
再见，贾科波。 Bye, Jacopo.
妈妈，我和你的朋友一起钓到了这个! Mamma, I fished this with your friend!
太棒了。 Fantastic.
-我走了。-一路走好。 -I'm leaving. -Have a good journey.
听着，为了安全起见，... Listen, to be on the safe side…
你能移除那个诅咒吗？ Can you remove it?
-继续......-好吧，靠近点。 -Go on… -Ok, come closer.
闭上你的眼睛。 Close your eyes.
在那里! There!
-是这样吗？-是的。 -Is that it? -Yes.
-欢迎回来!嗨。 -好了，我们走吧。 -Welcome back! Hi. -Ok, let's go.
我们走吧。 Let's go.
我也很高兴见到你。 I'm happy to see you too.
谢谢。 Thanks.
那我就去吧。 I'll go then.
你不放弃，是吗？你会打破对讲机的。 You don't give up, do you? You'll break the intercom.
我在找萨拉。 I'm looking for Sara.
-三楼的那个女孩？-是的。 -The girl on the third floor? -Yes.
她要在圣尤西比乌斯教堂结婚。 She's getting married at the Church of Saint Eusebius.
和谁结婚？ Who to?
一位重要建筑师的儿子。 The son of an important architect.
她很贴心，给我带了一个结婚礼物。 She's so sweet, she brought me a wedding favour.
这不可能是真的! It can't be true!
圣尤西比乌斯教堂。 Church of Saint Eusebius.
马上就到。朱... Right away. Chu…
-你是什么...？-楚... -What are you…? -Chu…
教堂街。如果地址是正确的......。 Church Street. If the address is correct…
不! No!
我不得不说 "不"。 I have to say "No".
地址不明。请重复。 Address unknown. Please repeat.
右转进入教堂街。。 Turn right onto Church Street.
靠右行驶。向左走。死胡同。转回。 Keep to the right. Keep to the left. Dead end. Turn back.
重新规划路线。重新规划... Re-planning route. Re-planning…
-换过来吧，我来开车。-但是... -Move over, I'll drive. -But…
否则我就把那东西砸到你头上！"。 Or I'll smash that thing over your head!
重新规划路线，重新规划......。 Re-planning route, re planning…
-安静。-做得很好。 -Quiet. -Well done.
亲爱的兄弟姊妹们。 Dear brethren,
我们欢欢喜喜地聚集在主的殿中。 we are gathered here with joy in the House of the Lord,
庆祝这两个年轻人的婚姻。 to celebrate the marriage of these two young people.
我米尔科，愿意娶你为我的合法妻子...... I Mirko, take thee to be my lawfully wedded wife…
等等，萨拉，不要这样做! Wait, Sara, don't do it!
你不是萨拉! You're not Sara!
对不起，我弄错了婚礼。 I'm sorry, I've got the wrong wedding.
对不起，我先出去了。 Sorry, I'll get out.
贾科波... Jacopo…
你已经花了足够长的时间。 It's taken you long enough.
萨拉，我一直是个傻瓜。 Sara, I've been a fool.
所发生的一切......都是我的错。 Everything that's happened… It's my fault,
我很害怕被束缚住。 I was scared of being tied down.
但我爱你... But I love you…
我爱你。 I love you.
比我在这个世界上爱过的任何人都要多。 More than I've ever loved anyone else in the world.
我发誓我想让你快乐。 I swear I want to make you happy.
并非一切都能顺利进行。 Not everything can work out well.
我们甚至可能分手... We might even split up…
不，不是我想这样做。 No, not that I want to.
但是，如果我们要分道扬镳。 But if we were to split up,
如果能和你分道扬镳，那就太好了。 it would be nice to split up with you.
我是说......这就是生活。 I mean… that's life.
事情在变，人也在变。如果你想改变而我不... Things change and so do people. If you want to change and I don't…
-或者我有......这是最好的一点。-这就够了！ -Or I do… That's the best bit. -That's enough!
我明白。 I understand.
你现在能吻我吗？ Will you kiss me now?
在这里？ Here?
请原谅我... Excuse me…
这是我结婚的日子! This is my wedding day!
-你是对的。对不起。-我们要走了。 -You're right. Sorry. -We're leaving.
让我们继续。 Let's carry on.
怎么样？ Well?
等等... Wait…
你愿意嫁给我吗？ Will you marry me?
你不觉得我们太匆忙了吗？ Don't you think we're rushing things?
太匆忙？ Rushing things?
你有没有伤到你自己？ Have you hurt yourself?
不，我总是这样走下台阶。 No, I always come down steps like that.
我们会被踢出去的。 We'll get kicked out.
我愿意嫁给你。 I'll marry you.
我愿意嫁给你! I'll marry you!
据粗略计算， According to a rough calculation,
此时此刻，罗马有27280对夫妇正在接吻。 at this moment 27,280 couples in Rome are kissing.
也许是刚才还在争吵的那些人。 Perhaps the same ones who were arguing a moment before.
毕竟，爱情就是这样：你们亲吻，你们争吵，再亲吻。。 After all, love's like that: you kiss, you argue, kiss again.
有时是和同一个人，有时不是。。 Sometimes with the same person, sometimes not.
正如我的朋友西蒙娜所说：这就是生活，事情会发生变化。。 As my friend Simona would say: it's life, things change.
这是最好的一点。。 That's the best bit.
{an8}医生，我已经学到了我的教训。尊重是婚姻中的一切。 Doctor, I've learnt my lesson. Respect is everything in a marriage.
-对吗，亲爱的？-谁允许你说话的？ -Right, darling? -Who gave you permission to speak?
我给了你许可吗？ Did I give you permission?
-不。 -那就闭嘴吧，你这个混蛋。 -No. -Then shut up then, you shit.
这个色情电影的事情似乎是个好主意。 This porn film thing seemed a great idea.
但现在我们有另一个小问题。 But now we have another little problem.
是的，问题非常小。非常非常“小”! Yes, very little problem. Very very little!
不幸的是，这导致了一些讨厌的比较。 Unfortunately it's led to some nasty comparisons.
比较一下! Comparisons!
我们可以尝试另一种DVD吗？ Can we try another kind of DVD?
也许是一部纪录片？ A documentary maybe?
我亲爱的... My darling…
我们已经考虑过了。。 We've thought it over.
-我们真的不能分开。-我们太爱对方了。 -We really can't separate. -We love each other too much.
{你又说了 "莫妮卡"，我和她......。 -Monica and I… -You said "Monica" again.
{an8}不，我说的是 "西尔维娅"。 No, I said "Silvia".
不，你又说了 "莫妮卡"。 No, you said "Monica" again.
我和餐饮业的女人混在一起...... I got mixed up with the catering woman…
{an8}Mario，我不能再忍受这些了。 Mario, I can't take any more of this.
{an8}谁是马里奥？ Who's Mario?
{an8}我们接受了你的建议。从那以后，我们再也没有争吵过。 We took your advice. We haven't argued since.
{an8}从来没有。这已经是天堂了。 Never. It's been heaven.
-但是...... -还有一个但是。 -But… -And there's a but.
那就是......这是个沉重的过程!完全无聊! That is… it's heavy going! A total bore!
我们差点就分道扬镳了。 We nearly split up.
亲爱的，亲爱的，真令人厌烦！我们喜欢争论。我们喜欢争吵。 Sweetie, darling, what a bore! We enjoyed arguing.
我们实际上是出于好奇才来到这里。 We actually came here out of curiosity.
我们听说你非常高兴。 We heard you're very happy.
-还是萨拉吗？-管好你自己的事。 -Is it still Sara? -Mind your own business.
这就是我们的目的。问是可以的，答是礼貌的。 That's what we came for. It's OK to ask, polite to answer.
-通常的八卦者。-无稽之谈。你是说八卦者。 -The usual gossipist. -Ignorant. You mean gossiper.
听教授的话！"。 Listen to the professor!
-聪明的傻瓜!-聪明的屁股! -Smart aleck! -Smart ass!
-事情进展得很顺利。-萨拉没有再发生意外。 -Things are going just fine. -Sara's had no more accidents.
根本就没有。 None at all.
我们可以说诅咒已经被解除了。 We can say the curse has been lifted.
{特别是自从你进入我们的生活后。 Especially since you came into our lives.
事实上，我们想感谢你。 In fact, we wanted to thank you.
-那是 "不客气 "吗？-我不知道。 -Was that "you're welcome"? -I don't know.
-这有点夸张了。-等她长大了再说。 -That's exaggerating a bit. -Wait till she grows up.
-为什么，她会长大吗？-是的，她会长大的! -Why, will she grow up? -Yes, she'll grow up!
你会的，不是吗？ You will, won't you?